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Tuesday, December 30, 2003
The Holiday
Why can't people be at work today? I have things to do and everyone is all "Oh we're closed until January 5th." Or "Today is December 26th. We are closed." (Yes, I know it's not December 26th. That just means they've decided to stay closed, and haven't even bothered to change their voicemail.)
Well that's not good enough! I have deadlines on January 5th and you're keeping me from meeting them! I don't have time for your vacations! Today's not a holiday, is it? Go to work!
12/30/2003 09:46:00 AM link
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Monday, December 29, 2003
The Obvious
I'm Monica Gellar-Bing from Friends!
Take the Friends Quiz here.
created by stomps.
12/29/2003 12:25:00 AM link
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Friday, December 26, 2003
The Change
Look! A new domain!
Hm. It doesn't look much different than the old one...
12/26/2003 01:25:00 AM link
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Saturday, December 20, 2003
The Grade
That's right. After the second major exam, I still have an A in accounting.
That's an A.
Blam.
12/20/2003 02:11:00 AM link
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Wednesday, December 17, 2003
The Blog
So as of 12-26, I'll be at a new domain: www.mickropolis.com
I got tired of my full name being up there. But don't try and go now. It won't work until then, mostly because I don't always understand my hosting stuff.
Don't say I didn't warn you.
12/17/2003 02:14:00 AM link
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Tuesday, December 16, 2003
The Dare
So the ex and I are sitting at Chilis. Nothing out of the ordinary. But suddenly I have a craving for cheesecake. In a moment of carb weakness I order.
Me: You're eating most of this.
The ex: OK.
So we eat. It's just like I'd dreamed. (Yes, I've been having carb dreams. It's sad.) But after about three bites (and eight zillion carbs) I have to stop. The ex eats all but about two bites. And then she stops too.
But there are still two bites left. Two wonderful cheesecake-y bites. To stop myself from eating them, I grab the salt shaker and cover the plate with salt.
And I mean cover.
Me: I dare you to eat that.
The ex grabs her fork and puts it in the salt-covered cheesecake.
Me: No! I was kidding!
The ex puts her fork down.
Me: OK, do it.
And she does. I wish I'd had my camera so I could show you the look on her face. I laughed so hard I was crying for about five minutes.
The ex: I think I feel bloated already.
This is one of those things that's only funny if you were there, and you weren't (unless you were one of those annoying girls in the booth next to us, or the dude dressed like he was from 1992 across the bar) but some things just have to be blogged.
You understand.
12/16/2003 11:02:00 AM link
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Saturday, December 13, 2003
The Tip
Hi, I'm Micky. I just got a $200 tip for one night of bartending.
Blam. Looks like there's gonna be a Christmas after all.
12/13/2003 02:40:00 AM link
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Tuesday, December 09, 2003
The Charade
You may have noticed...I've gone into seclusion. See, I think things have just gone too far.
Here's the real story. I've been dating Gwyneth Paltrow for a couple of years now. But since I'm in school and she's all famous and stuff, we agreed to keep it a secret, so that I could live my life free of the worries of celebrity. We've even cooked up these elaborate schemes to convince the world that she's with someone else.
Luke Wilson? And Gwyneth? I'm so sure. He was working out just fine, but he started to get too sloppy. I had to cut him loose.
Which was when this whole Coldplay thing started. "Oooh. He's macro. It's perfect! We'll fool the whole world!" we said one day over some key lime pie (Yes, Gwyneth eats pie...especially key lime. It's her favorite.). So we gave him a call and set the wheels in motion. We even got Blythe in on the deal. She's good people, that Blythe.
But now I think things are getting out of hand. Pregnant? Marriage license? It's one thing to hide our love from the whole world, but it's totally another thing to go and marry some other dude and pretend to have his baby. That pram you got on Ellen yesterday? So unnecessary.
I swear, it's like I don't even know you anymore...
12/09/2003 01:04:00 PM link
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Thursday, December 04, 2003
The Ticket
Apparently running a red light is now considered illegal. Never mind that EVERYONE DOES IT AT EVERY RED LIGHT IN CHICAGO.
I'm not talking about just blatantly running a light that has already turned red, but everyone speeds up during yellow...am I wrong? If you live in Chicago, you can't say I'm wrong.
But I actually got pulled over. I now owe $75 and it's on my record or $105 (why 105 exactly? Why not just $100?) and traffic school to get it off my record.
Anyone been to traffic school? Is it comparable to accounting? Is it a one time thing, or are there lots of classes? Do I just have to go and watch a safety video and then leave?
Stupid laws.
12/04/2003 01:35:00 AM link
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Tuesday, December 02, 2003
The Textbooks
Here is a list of words I am so over reading. It's like these people find one fancy word and use it in every other paragraph.
a priori
vis a vis
raison d'etre
Yes, I know they're all foreign words. But just because you know a foreign word, that doesn't mean you're smart. I know that "la vache" is French for "cow" but that does not make me smarter. It just means that I memorized something. I doubt these losers have any idea what their words mean...they're just throwing them in because it's the cool thing to do.
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