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Friday, August 30, 2002
The Quarterback
8/30/2002 01:29:00 PM link
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Thursday, August 29, 2002
The Stupidity
So I have a truck. It's made to haul things, right? Today I hauled some plywood from one theatre to another. No big deal.
My truck has a cover on the bed. When the cover is on, it's supported by the main frame and two cross bars. The part of the frame that goes over the tailgate comes when you have bigger things to load.
Plywood is big. I had to remove the cover, both cross bars and the back part of the frame. I put them in the bed.
Plywood is so big that the tailgate can't be closed when there is plywood in the bed. This means that the tailgate remained open.
This means that the crossbars and the frame piece had nothing to keep them from falling out of the back of the truck.
So, unfettered and yearning to breathe free, they did. I lost a cross bar and the frame piece. We found them later, after they'd been run over a number of times and no longer actually worked in the truck. And because the frame piece is broken, I can't even put the cover back on without the use of some duct tape, and I draw the line there.
Dumb.
8/29/2002 11:35:00 AM link
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Wednesday, August 28, 2002
The Bug
Don't ask why we had a party on a Tuesday night. Even when I have to wake up in 4 hours.
And don't ask why we didn't always close the back door when people were outside.
And don't ask why there's the creepiest bug I've ever seen under the Raid can next to my monitor.
Just don't ask.
8/28/2002 02:16:00 AM link
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Tuesday, August 27, 2002
The Hunter
One of the props I have to find for one of the shows I'm designing is a kill bag.
Yeah. I didn't know what that was either.
Apparently when you kill animals while you're in the woods or something, you put them in a trendy bag to tote them home. So I have to find one. I went to Galyans' hunting section and encountered a man right out of Deliverance. He was scary looking, but then when he talked, you could tell he was just dumb. I think all he knows about is hunting. Yee.
Anyway. Here's what happened:
Me: Let's say I were going to kill a small animal or something. What sort of bag would I use to bring it home?
Scary Galyans Hunting Guy: What kind of animal?
Me: Oh, like a rabbit or a squirrel or something...
SGHG: You don't need a bag for that, just put them in a grocery bag or a lunchbag or something. But don't expect it to keep all day. You need to get that thing gutted pretty quickly.
Me: Right. OK. Let's say it's something bigger.
SGHG: Like what?
Me: Oh, I don't know. Let's say it's a deer. Yeah. Let's say I'm killing a deer.
SGHG: Oh well then you need to dress it and then put it in one of these bags. I know I have some here somewhere...
(much aisle searching ensues...
SGHG: Well, they look like cheesecloth.
Me: What does cheesecloth look like? Is it meshy?
SGHG: No...Hey! Here it is! Look! You get four per package, and you dress up the deer, and then it should be about 48 by 42 and then you just put it in this bag.
My first thoughts are...how do I dress a deer? How am I supposed to know what they want to wear for the funeral? It's not like I know them. I didn't chat before I shot them. It's tough.
Second. How do you just "put the deer in the bag"? I'm thinking the deer is pretty heavy. There has to be a little more effort involved than just popping it in there.
Third. This man is scary, and I need to leave.
So that was my hunting excursion. I think I'm going to use a duck decoy thing, because I know if I take in cheesecloth and tell the director that's what they use, he's going to send me after something else.
8/27/2002 02:39:00 PM link
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Sunday, August 25, 2002
The Champion
...of Golden Tee 2003.
Yeah. That's right.
8/25/2002 11:50:00 PM link
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Thursday, August 22, 2002
The Rain
It's not fair. The power is out at the ex's office today, so she doesn't have to go in. But a few blocks away, my office is happily lit and working. Sad.
Granted, I don't actually have to go in if I really don't want to, but I have stuff to do.
This rain is getting out of control. And I say that, not just because my yellow butterfly chair has been ruined by too many nights on the deck in the rain, but because it was really loud last night and it's still going strong. Is there no end in sight?
Sigh.
8/22/2002 11:09:00 AM link
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The Conversation That Would Not Die
(Just imagine, if you will, the argument prior to this conversation about how Mikey does not pay enough attention to me, and then...)
Subaru: mickey
Subaru: mouse
My0001: that's it.
My0001: we're done now.
Subaru: ohhhhh
Subaru: :-(
My0001: see what happens when you're all rude?
Subaru: when i'm all rude?
My0001: mmhmm
Subaru: "Subaru: as if anyone hotter could be found
My0001: you wouldn't have to look very hard"
Subaru: "Subaru: cuz this sh*t is hella good
My0001: why, are you looking at a magazine or something? "
Subaru: hmmm
Subaru: you're the rude one
My0001: i don't think so
Subaru: pshhhh
Subaru: eat this bloat monkey
My0001: i think that's inappropriate, as well as completely incomprehensible
Subaru:
My0001: points at least for such a big word
Subaru: points?
My0001: i get some points!
My0001: yeah!
Subaru: minus 3
My0001: nooooo
Subaru: minus 5 for arguing
My0001: you're mean
Subaru: minus 10 for lying
My0001: i'm not lying, you're really mean
Subaru: i'm sooooo not mean
Subaru: i am the nicest person you'll ever meet
My0001: then why do you insist on removing my points?
Subaru: because you are lying and cheating
My0001: i am not
My0001: i am completely honest
Subaru: you said i am mean
Subaru: thats a lie
Subaru: negative 10 points
My0001: see? you keep taking away my points. mean
Subaru: its not mean
Subaru: its the rules
Subaru: if you lie
Subaru: you lose points
My0001: i think you lose 50 points for being mean
Subaru: what?
Subaru: see you're lying again
My0001: nope
Subaru: do i need to up the points lost for lying?
My0001: nope, i think you'd lose too many points
Subaru: i cannot believe you are still continuing to lie
Subaru: lying is bad
Subaru: for your heart and your girth
My0001: i cannot believe we are continuing to have this conversation
Subaru: i cannot believe we are either
Subaru: especially since i've clearly won
My0001: oh please
My0001: you've so the opposite of won
Subaru: please honey, i know you feel damaged and your manhood is at stake, but you need to admit when you've lost, and baby, you've losssssssssssst!
This goes on for about 50 more lines. It's sad, really, what sort of conversations pop up at one in the morning.
I need to go to bed.
8/22/2002 01:38:00 AM link
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The Addiction
I can stop whenever I want. Really. I'm in total control. It's just that it's good and cheap and puts me in such a good mood. Sure, there are some days when I have 6 or 7, but most days I keep it down to 1 or 2. Or 3.
OK, so I just had 2 in the last 10 minutes, but that's no big deal. When you think about all the --
All right...I just went and had two more. Sue me.
Anyway...when you think of all the other terrible things I could be consuming, this really doesn't seem all that bad, now does it?
The problem now, is that I've had all the good ones, and now I'm down to the purple and the pink. This box didn't have very many blues either, which is so unfair, as they are the best ones.
But fear not, Fla-Vor-Ice is a cheap snack with only 25 calories per ice. I can eat as many as I want and not feel guilty, because really, what is it? Colored water! I've gone through almost 100, but it cost me less than 5 bucks. And if you click on the link, you'll learn all about the history of Fla-vor-ice, brought to you by the kids at Frozen Liquids.com.
8/22/2002 12:50:00 AM link
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Wednesday, August 21, 2002
The Others
I, of course, knew that other people blogged. I've even talked to some of them online. But I've never actually met any.
Until last night.
We're at a bar (which in itself is random, because LIJ had to stop at home for more cigarettes, and I happened to be sitting there watching Robbie Williams Live on TV, and if he didn't have this filthy habit, none of this would have happened, so there you go) and we're talking to the people in the show he's working on. All of a sudden it dawns on me that they went to school with Peter. So I did that thing where you ask people if they know other people, even though the chances of them actually knowing those said people are very slim, although they were all in the theatre department together, so the chances were higher, and one of them said, "Yeah, I know him...his ex-girlfriend is here, actually." To which I responded, "Haley?", because I've read Pete's blog for over a year now, so I actually know about people in his life (which is the strange part, because I've never met him...), and the ISU dude said, "Yeah, Haley." And I said, "Here, like Chicago, or here, in this bar?"
"In this bar, she just walked in."
Wow. It dawns on me that I used to read Haley's blog too, until it disappeared. And then she walks into the room that I'm sitting in. We talk for a while, about blogging and the Chicago Bloggers. Then she says, "You probably know Brett...he's in the next room."
Two in one night was almost more than I could take.
So LIJ and I finished our beers and started to leave. Since I had to pay my tab, we stood at the bar for a minute, and I looked around. Luckily Pete puts pictures on his site all the time, so I knew Brett instantly. Haley happened to tell me that he does theatre jobs that I am always looking to fill, so I stopped by his table and introduced myself.
"Are you Brett?"
"Yeah"
"Hi, I'm Micky...this is going to sound weird, but I've read your website..."
"Wait...The Tao of Micky, right?"
Woah. It had sunk in that the people whose blogs I read are actually real, but I hadn't thought about the fact that those real people might have stumbled upon mine.
So that's that. A weird night, but cool. Now go show them some love and visit their sites.
8/21/2002 11:50:00 AM link
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Tuesday, August 20, 2002
The Card
I remember when I first got my Structure card. I think I wanted a jacket (jackets and coats are my downfall...) and I didn't have enough cash to buy it. But it was on sale for 50% off, so I really had no choice.
I should have known that I didn't need the Structure card. But it and the Gap were the only stores in Des Moines that even remotely had the clothes that I wear.
Not any more.
I always get these coupons from Structure in the mail giving me free things or discounts or other fun stuff. I made it a point to go yesterday during the anniversary shopping extravaganza, because I had a $15 off coupon. I thought I could get a plain polo shirt or something, and only pay 15 bucks. Boy was I wrong.
Structure is now "Express Men". Don't ask why. I don't know. And their clothes are all GQ and stuff. I can't wear that. I get dirty. I fall over a lot. I work in theatre...I have to weld some wire sculpture this week for god's sake! I'm not going to wear a fuschia camp shirt made of rayon.
So I think it's time to retire the Structure card. It's been paid off for years. I never use it. I shop at Old Navy and American Eagle. Why don't I get cards there, so I can get the same coupon-y goodness and cancel my worthless Structure card? It should be worth the trouble!
Shopper's angst is the worst.
8/20/2002 10:30:00 AM link
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The Movie...
was so good.
Sigh.
8/20/2002 09:03:00 AM link
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Monday, August 19, 2002
The Impossible
How could someone be angry with my Gwyneth? But it's true. Look at this article that I stole from movies.com about the new Gwyneth movie, Possession:
Filming, which started on August 29, has recently disrupted traffic in London's Sloane Gardens for two days straight. After being told by the London Council "Well, it is Gwyneth Paltrow, after all," British society maven Cindy Jackson complained to the London Mirror saying "I hope they deduct two days' council tax from my next bill because of the inconvenience. I don't care who Gwyneth is."
Why would someone say that? How could they not care? I've just added this Cindy Jackson ho to the head of my parade of hate.
8/19/2002 06:21:00 PM link
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The Perfect Pancake Maker!
Yes. I got it in the mail today. It's something that I always thought looked really fun, but never actually felt the need to buy it. But my grandma knew. She knew its importance. So she ordered it for me...and here it is! I'm pretty psyched. Tomorrow is pancake day!
If you've been living under a rock and have no idea what it is, you can go see it for yourself at their official website.
8/19/2002 06:14:00 PM link
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The Anniversary
Yesterday marked one year in Chicago for me and the ex. Today, the weather is exactly like it was the day we moved up. (Rainy!)
In celebration, we went to a concert on Friday (Toby Keith and Rascal Flatts -- it's was really good...and for those of you who don't know, they're country...), I did a little shopping yesterday while she was at work, and today we're making a pilgrimage to Ikea. There may also be a little Woodfield Mall action in the future...and the new Gwyneth movie.
Should be a good day.
8/19/2002 08:32:00 AM link
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Friday, August 16, 2002
The Crime
We went to Home Depot today to take back a light switch that didn't work. We'd been cleaning all day. We were hungry.
And there, looming in the distance, like an oasis of snacks...was the Steak and Shake.
We drove over, parked, and opened the doors of my truck. Which was when my passenger hit the door of the car next to us. A very nice antique car with a hot green finish. Now there was already a little ding in the driver's side door, but this one obviously came from my truck. So what did we do?
We fled, hoping that no one saw and got my license plate number.
So I'm on the lam now.
8/16/2002 08:51:00 PM link
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Thursday, August 15, 2002
The Unimaginable
This just in from Andy:
"The beauty thing about blogging is that its not a competition. There may be people who worry about popularity or being cool or who has the most hits or who has the best design ... and for those people, that's what this is about. For others its just a place to dump their thoughts. For still others its a way to get dates."
Get dates? Really? People do that? What am I doing wrong?
8/15/2002 12:57:00 AM link
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The Obvious
Which Buffy Guy Are You? Find out @ She's Crafty
Not like we didn't already know this. I decided how to have my hair cut based on his look for three seasons in a row, for God's sake...
8/15/2002 12:52:00 AM link
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The Con
I am a stupid stupid man. We're standing outside of ESPN Zone tonight, and these dudes come up and want to shine our shoes. We tell them we don't need our shoes shined. They insist. So they shine our shoes. And they look good. As he's finishing, he says, "Now it's only eight dollars a shoe, plus a nice tip." In my head, I'm saying "Excuse me?" But what do I do? I don't feel like tangling with some homeless dude on the street, so I give him a twenty.
Stupid, I know.
What made me feel even more stupid is that my friend's response to the eight dollars a shoe bit is to give the dude two bucks and walk back inside.
Why didn't I do that? I had two bucks. It's not like I said "Hey, come over here and shine my shoes!" I bet that shoeshine guys in the airport aren't that expensive. But I'm too much of a pansy to argue.
Here's the worst part: this isn't the first time I've been conned. Once I was in the parking lot of Ace Hardware, and some dude drives up in his truck and says that he noticed the dent in my car door, and would I like him to pop it out. I said no, but he said (and this is how they do it...), "Let me just show you something." Then he pops it out, and even though I said I didn't want it, I feel like I'm supposed to pay him.
I ignore the Streetwise sellers. Why can't I ignore these other people? Because they're performing a service (of sorts) and I feel obligated. They're very smart. And I'm sure fairly rich.
And I wonder why I have no money.
8/15/2002 12:15:00 AM link
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Wednesday, August 14, 2002
The Revenge
LIJ's been having a laundry extravaganza (which is still 8 loads smaller than when I wash all my clothes...but I digress...) for the past two days. While folding his clean clothes, he feels that he must watch a movie. (Never mind that folding laundry really doesn't take two hours, or even an hour and a half, but I digress again...) Yesterday he chose Sliding Doors and today he's watching Bounce.
Now you know my girlfriend Gwyneth is in both of these movies. Which means that I am unlikely to accept any sort of criticism about said movies.
And yet he complains. He doesn't like the ending of SD. He's disturbed by the premise of Bounce. He does not see the fact that GWYNETH IS THE STAR! THESE MOVIES ARE PERFECT!! STOP YOUR COMPLAINING!!!
NOTE: I didn't say that "Gwyneth is in them; these movies are perfect." That would imply that some less than perfect movies (i.e. Anniversary Party, Austin Powers 3, etc.) that feature Gwyneth are, in fact, perfect. This is not the case.
So I knocked over a pile of t-shirts that he'd just finished folding. But really it's not my fault. They were sitting on the floor, and my foot accidentally hit the pile. What could I do?
Make fun of my Gywn and feel my wrath. Just you try it.
8/14/2002 03:45:00 PM link
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The Trouble With Staying Up Late
I should be in bed. I know this. I'm sleepy and I want to go to bed. But what am I doing?
I'm sitting here.
Sigh.
8/14/2002 01:58:00 AM link
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Tuesday, August 13, 2002
The People
Look at all the new love on the side there! Go. Visit.
Ok, you can stay for a minute. I'll tell you why I started reading new blogs today. Because the power went out at the theatre, and what should have been a full day of work turned into about an hour of work. Woo.
8/13/2002 08:59:00 PM link
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The Bugs
For some reason we have a bug infestation in our kitchen. It's tons of little tiny gnat-eque things, and here and there, something slightly bigger, but still small. The weird thing is that we never see them alive, we just find their little corpses all over the kitchen. It's really gross.
I suppose I shouldn't complain, since the Japanese Beetles haven't been nearly as bad this year.
But then should I be worrying? What if they're all dead from West Nile virus? I think I've had West Nile virus before (or maybe not...I had something from Egypt once...or maybe that was a dream) and I recall it not being fun. Maybe I'm immune and my roommates will be getting is soon. I could say hahahahahahahaha far too many times, reverting to the maturity of a third grader, but then I'd realize that what I'd actually be stuck with is two sick roommates. Bleh.
Anyone have any bug suggestions? They don't seem to be too bothersome, but you never know. Maybe they are and I just can't see them until they're dead.
8/13/2002 06:41:00 PM link
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The Psychic
I was cleaning out the 300 messages in my inbox, and ran across an email from Angie in April. The subject was "Soooo DMB-ish!" (That's a good thing...we love Dave Matthews...)
And guess what the message was? A link to John Mayer! Who is now in my CD player on repeat. He rocks.
And Angie knew so long ago. Before everyone else. Wise Angie.
8/13/2002 04:49:00 PM link
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Sunday, August 11, 2002
The Wonder
Oh Ikea. I knew how wonderful you were. I always knew and never doubted. But the new catalogue...
It's just too much.
There's so much beauty and love and wonder that I can't stand it. The little stickers you provided inside the cover were hardly enough for me to mark all of the cool things I must have. I had to use them sparingly, knowing that I will look through the pages at least once a week for the next couple of months, until I have them all memorized.
Do I really need a 69-1/2" paper mobile of concentric circles to hang in my apartment? Probably not, but somehow I feel that I must have it.
Do I need backlit wall art? Yes. I must.
The adjustable air-filled chair (with matching footstool). It will be mine.
I may have to auction off some of my other stuff to make the money and the space, but I think it might be worth it.
Oh Ikea. Love.
8/11/2002 10:44:00 PM link
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Saturday, August 10, 2002
The Best Day
Got up and went with Jenny F. to ride our bikes on the lakeshore. Then we went back to the pool/hottub in her apartment building. Then we got food.
And I didn't work at all.
8/10/2002 08:03:00 PM link
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Thursday, August 08, 2002
The Addiction
I've recently become obsessed with the new Jennifer Love Hewitt song.
Don't waste your time poking fun. The same thing happened during I Still Know What You Did with How Do I Deal?
8/08/2002 10:22:00 PM link
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The Catalogue
My copy of the 2003 Ikea catalogue was waiting for me when I got home. So there shel. :P
8/08/2002 09:52:00 PM link
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The Plane
American Airlines rules. After that whole Vanguard debacle, I changed my flights to American. Which means I flew out of O'Hare (yes, I went to the right airport on the first try!...unlike last time...)
It's so much better than Midway, it's not even funny. At Midway, they send you to a basement or something to get onto the plane. At O'Hare there's actual carpet on the floor at the gate. It's nice. And across from my gate was a McDonalds. How did they know I was hungry? They just knew.
But the best part is that you can check in with a little computer and not have to wait in line. You can even check baggage and change your seat. It rules.
I used the computer both ways and changed my seat both times.
Although I didn't use my new seat on the way back to Chicago, because, in a stroke of randomness, my friend Todd from high school (who I haven't seen in like 6 years) was on the same flight. So we sat together and talked about things like how some of our other classmates have these jobs on Wall Street and have to be all grown up and how we're so not there yet. Or how they're married...and have children.
Sadly, he's moving to Boston for grad school on Monday. Everyone wish Todd good luck!
8/08/2002 09:49:00 PM link
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Tuesday, August 06, 2002
The Sunburn: Part IV
So I'm at the peeling stage. I look like I'm turning into The Fly. It's not cool.
I know you're not supposed to actually peel the skin off, but that's all I want to do. Anything that will stop the itching...
8/06/2002 11:34:00 PM link
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Monday, August 05, 2002
The Plea
So it's not really my plea, but Miss Shauny has started up a petition about something I truly believe in. Granted, she's focusing mostly on Australia, but since it's election day tomorrow, I think we should all take part in the political mileu. Please. Go look at the petition and help make a difference.
8/05/2002 05:58:00 PM link
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Sunday, August 04, 2002
The Shoes
Oh yes. The shoes. They're so great. They're kind of brown and kind of black. So I can wear them with anything! Just look:
After pulling out my old brown suede shoes (that have definitely seen better days), mom said "Do we need to buy you some new shoes?" Obviously we did. Because these shoes rule. And Norstrom's rules because they were $30 off. And the Nordstrom's shoes guys are cool. Unlike the Dillards shoe guy who hurt my foot with the shoehorn by trying to squeeze me into a size 9, when I told him 10 and 1/2, with the reasoning "these run a little big". Then he said that you should wear thin socks to break shoes in and then move up to thicker socksf they feel too small.
He also kept saying, "If I were you, I'd spend the extra $20 for a better pair of shoes." Well, are you going to give me 20 bucks? Are you purposely showing me bad shoes so that I'll pay more and give you a bigger commision? He was awfully tricky, if you know what I mean.
We promptly left the store before he gave me some excuse like, "Blood in your shoes is a sign of good quality!"
And found the shoes. I love them. And they looked so good with my pants. And shirt and tie. And jacket.
I pretty much ruled at the wedding.
8/04/2002 06:09:00 PM link
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Friday, August 02, 2002
The Sunburn: Part III
The blotchiness has taken shape. Although it would be interesting if it looked like the Virgin Mary or George Washington or something, my sunburn now bears a strong resemblance to the red tank top I wore to the Cubs game last week. So it's just the skin that hasn't seen the sun in (wow...) over a year that is still red and painful.
Speaking of painful...lidocaine, my brothers and sisters, is the answer. I used the aloe with the vitamin E (I couldn't find any lavender oil at Jewel...well...it is Jewel after all...) but it didn't really do a whole lot except make everything hurt more. And while I strongly advocate the use of tylenol to lessen the pain, this "refreshingly blue" menthol/lydocaine gel rules. I feel like I'm skiing down a mountain. It's all very "York Peppermint Patty".
Also picked up some self tanner to eliminate the blotchiness on my neck before my cousin's wedding tomorrow. Risky, I know. But better than the white stripe across my neck, emphasizing the fact that, yes, I have more than one chin. If that works, then maybe all of the blotchiness can go away too.
The trip to KC started out with a fun computerized check in at the airport (O'Hare, not Midway...), with no line and no annoying people to deal with. It was cool. And there was a McDonalds right next to my gate. And I'm reading such a good book (loaned to me by the ex). And I don't hurt. It's been a pretty good day so far.
8/02/2002 03:44:00 PM link
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Thursday, August 01, 2002
The Sunburn: Part II
Wow I'm blotchy. This is highly inappropriate. I have this whole Michael Jackson thing going on, where my actual shoulders are white, but everything around them seems to be even redder than it was yesterday. It's very strange.
And it hurts too. Until I remembered that it had been 8 hours since my last dose of tylenol. Stupid.
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